The Past is tied directly into the future. Daily we unknowingly plot our future. We burn bridges that haven’t even been built yet, we rip pages out of our lives that we will need and all without seeing it coming. This makes me think, would it matter to me if my life was different. If I went back in time and moved to another state or country would my life be as complete as it is now? Would the vacancy of what I have now touch me? Would it even matter to me? After all if that happened I wouldn’t have any recollection of my current living. I don’t think I would miss what I have now. You can’t miss what you never had. I find that saying funny. It’s true and false at the same time. You cant miss what you never had but the fact that you don’t have it can drill a hole so deep and dark and moth eaten, filthy that the feelings would be almost identical. It’s not a question of “will the past affect the future” the past will affect the future. The events of yesterday always have and always will determine the day we see tomorrow. There’s no getting around it. Even if some sophisticated person tries to hide or erase the archives of our history. Even if a well known trusted friend, or a scholar on an intelligent pedestal tells us what did or didn’t happen. Weather or not we believe them the future will happen. History is its own entity that doesn’t care if we believe what it has done or has in store for us. It will continue to do its job and keep the things that we did a moment past in our present. No matter how long we live. As the good book says: Shall ye reap that thou hast sewn. Weather or not you know that you sewn it.
Individuality doused in gasoline and lit ablaze. Not on my watch!
The big thing that I can relate to 1987 with is the extinguishing of all creativity, personality, individuality or things of that kind. The stifling of ones sense of self expression is in my opinion one of the most atrocious of acts. To take a person’s thoughts from them is inhumane. The one thing that a person really owns, that is all theirs. The single possession that one has to separate themselves from the masses is their mind. To take that from me would be the end of my life as I know it. If I wasn’t me I would find no reason to continue existence. If I couldn’t be me then the point of life would be to continue life. There is no real purpose in that. In my perspective life is about finding yourself. Knowing your reason to be alive, and if you have no personality or individuality then your purpose would be the same as everyone else. You would live to stay alive. I would rather die. That’s what’s going to happen in the end to all of us so there is no reason to live unless you have a personal goal that you yourself push to achieve. In a simultaneous world I am just one drop in the ocean. But in the world as we know it now I am a drop of blood in the ocean. I stand apart from my fellow water drops yet I leave a little of me in all of them. The sharks of this world are after me and the minnows of this world avoid me. This is what sets me apart from my peers. I see only transparent photocopies one behind another in a neat stack. I am the paper that was set on the copier crooked to make a unique yet sloppily charming individual. I have been frowned upon for perusing myself which leads me to think that the world doesn’t want me to be myself. The majority of people require conformity to feel secure. I need to be the one that draws gasps from John and Jane doe because they know that they wouldn’t dare try to imitate my person.
